Things I regret not doing in my 20s

1) Not wearing fashionable outfits that fits my age (20s)

I was very stingy. But now that I reach the age of 31 I realized I only lived once. And there are so many fashionable outfits I can surely rock had I not been sleeping on them in my 20s. Now I really wanted to wear them but wearing them would scream age-inappropriate. I wish I had worn them when I was younger.

I am not into revealing clothes and this was the main reason why I never followed what's in in the past. I only realized there are way too many fashionable and trendy outfits that does not reveal skin. my bad

2) Not cultivating friendships that will last a lifetime.

I don't have strong ties with my current friends. The friends I have right now are just temporary. It's not their fault. It was my choice not to invest feelings and time. My traumatic experience from high school left a deep scar that I am still having a hard time being vulnerable towards the friends I have had after high school. I was deeply hurt in the past. Now it is really hard for me to trust somebody completely. There were so many friends I had shut out from my life. They must have been puzzled why I did so. They must have hated or resented me. I am sorry towards them. But I can't muster the courage to personally apologize .

The friends I have right now don't prepare surprises for me. I can't even invite them to go on a trip with me. Still, it's all my fault. Because I never let them feel my availability. I am only available when I feel like it. Though they wanted to spend time, I only spend time with them when I feel convenient.